Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Case history of AGWA

due to popular demand(and due to the presence of royalty on my blog)

I shall be presenting a case history on AGWA
(for all you non medical people, here is your chance of having a peek on how we med students present cases to our teachers(keep an ear out next time you fall sick)) (for all medical students- kill me, I let some details off, because they didnt fit......this is MY blog, not yours)

Name: Anonymous girl with attitude(AGWA)
Age: 20's
Sex: yes please!
Occupation: occupied
Address: doesnt give one (can be traced)

patient is conscious and cooperative

Chief Complaints:
inability to fall asleep, short-sightedness, dark circles, feels the world is worthless, lack of appreciation - since 6 years
she also complains of too many crappy bloggers in blogosphere with not enough good ones having "spunk"

History Of Presenting Illness:

patient complains of having all these complaints since 6 years ago when she discovered the existence of the computer world(Acute onset??) . she says she sometimes feels that it calls her to it and that whenever she tries to leave it, she feels depressed and lonely without it(withdrawal syndrome??)

she complains of inability to fall asleep since one day after she found out the comp, and also suggests that this may possibly be related to the 20 something cups of coffee she has while surfing the net

she also complains of severe short sightedness and dark circles under her eyes since a day after, and hints that her staring at the screen from 2 mm apart may possibly have something to do with it

feeling of superiority and lack of appreciation started appearing after the 3rd day of starting symptoms. she says that this may possibly be due to the fact that she writes awesomely, and the rest are all "junk"

she started feeling the lack of "spunk" since the time some anonymous "jerk" wrote that word in her blog, this may also be somehow related to the time when she was a little girl and a dog barked on her even AFTER she gave it a cookie

Past history:
AGWA was relatively normal until she had an anonymous comment criticising her on her blog
she then completely burst up, and said that the world will see its first superhero with the power to destroy cyberlives
AGWA rose to fame when she made the world's first anonymous con on an unsuspecting blogger who tried to flirt with her, by inviting everyone to a party and ignoring the said young prankster.
she made this into her modus operandi after that and uptil now has destroyed the cyberlives of thousands and shattered the ego of tens of thousands
AGWA was awarded the anonymous blogger of the year award in 2002 and has since been retaining the trophy each year

Medical History:no significant history

Drug history: definitely(caffeine)

Family history: no one else of her family or friends spend as much time on the comp as she does

Personal history: wont tell

Differential Diagnosis: there is NO differential for AGWA!!!! she's one of a kind

General Physical examination: wont let me do it

Systemic examination: as IF

Further Manangement: stay clear of her as long as your cyberheart is beating, also, try to grow some spunk

45 comments:

  1. "Sex: Yes please!"
    OMG, I <3 you! :D
    *falls off chair laughing!*

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL!!

    errmm, did any1 tell u, u were funny? :-D

    good, imaginative n a fun read.
    but
    do u ve like, no work in the whole goddamn world 2 do?

    plus, how much will u 'pay' me if i actually bother 2 write 4 u? :-P

    ReplyDelete
  3. Express: Do not besmirch the name of his Awesomeness!

    His work spans on every imaginable good deed on Earth (That includes "diagnosing" fair maidens like the poor AGWA).

    Praise be to our saviour!

    ReplyDelete
  4. @ alok
    *YOUR* savior!
    [u seriously need 2 get a life :-P]

    n i need some1 2 save me 4m u..

    deluded,
    plz do the honours n finish this man 4 me.

    then I shall even give u the 'best blogger of the month' award :-P

    ReplyDelete
  5. Did anyone mention "money for writing for blogs" here? $_$

    Express: Aah you poor denier. Never mind, His Awesomeness Deluded will forgive you for your sin of denying him.

    One day you shall repent...

    *Meanwhile, goes back to his kingdom of Chocolateland and puts anti-Express spells*

    ReplyDelete
  6. huh!

    eat ur chocolate, I a m happy wid my endless durga puja bhog payes [kheer :-D]

    plus, i am eating chicken tandoori rite nw, so... haha on u!

    stop eating up deluded's comment space!
    plus
    i gtg, we can fight later!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Aww she left :( :(
    Now I don't have a villain to fight with. :'(

    Anycase.... I WON! :D :D

    Now I shall return to my kingdom and feast (we have Chicken biryani today) while I am on lookout for sinister miscreants and nonbelievers like Express. }:^D

    ReplyDelete
  8. rotfl

    imaginative i must say
    that's wt i call using your knowledge in the right way

    il surely be chkin out ur space for some more :P

    ReplyDelete
  9. btw saw my blog on ur blogroll :O

    was wondering
    would u pay me to write ??

    :P :P

    ReplyDelete
  10. @ ki

    I love you too
    (now a certain metal head will have my head)

    @ express

    this is just the peaceful time before the storm......Ive got exams in a week continuing for 3 months

    will be null those days

    and NO I will NOT take care of alok for you

    @ alok
    SAlUT!
    you are a true gentleman, you have recognised my AWESOME awesomeness

    dont worry.....bong girls get pissed early

    @ aditi

    please do
    and YOU are ALREADY being paid to write

    @Everyone

    money?
    if you write for me......
    yes, you will be paid in credit
    which you can turn to mentos......

    otherwise......you can get my SPECIAL currency....."dher saara pyaar"

    ReplyDelete
  11. "@Everyone

    money?
    if you write for me......
    yes, you will be paid in credit
    which you can turn to mentos......

    otherwise......you can get my SPECIAL currency....."dher saara pyaar""

    *sniff*

    cute. :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. @ aditi

    so would i ;)

    @ iron lady

    yesh yesh

    and NOW I have my homemade chocolates to enjoy!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Will you give them to us?
    We prefer that to the currency. And I speak for all of us.

    ReplyDelete
  14. alok,
    u won?
    IN YOUR DREAMS!

    miscreants? haha!! yea, thats me!

    and ur kingdom, hmm, i saw the entry gates last night and chose 2 surpass it, for the sake of my sanity! :-P

    deluded,
    yea, me n jiggs r being paid 2 ramble, but trust me, v cud do wid some money :-D

    u can barsao the pyar ka paisa on jiggs, i want hari patti! ka ching! :-P

    and i dunno abt bong women, I get pissed damn easy!

    P.S. u owe me money! I sent u a reader, recommend karke, jiggs :-P

    ReplyDelete
  15. Express: What is dream, what is reality, who knows?

    Wake up! Stop dreaming that I'm dreaming. You Lost. :P :D

    "chose 2 surpass it, for the sake of my sanity" : Precisely.

    Deluded: Homemade chocolates! yay! :O P:

    ReplyDelete
  16. @ alok
    wht r u putting up ":P" n ":D" for?
    u r so stupid tht its not even funny!

    and can v do stupid discussion somewhr else and not spoil the comment section of a brilliantly written post?

    ReplyDelete
  17. @ alok, express

    feel free to continue

    I love you both(in a strictly 'non-gay' fashion alok- I know you're an IITan....so....just in case) :P

    besides, having a BIG comment section makes me seem awesome and spunky
    those are two words I just LOVE

    ReplyDelete
  18. completely cracked me up haha... deja vu for me atleast when i am back home... hostel life does'nt guarantee all day net access...

    ReplyDelete
  19. @ swayam

    wow......I think I can guess....
    youre budding AGWA no.2


    @Weevil girl

    that wasnt sarcasm, Im serious

    you are SO cool on SO many different levels

    Ive even put you on my watchlist

    ReplyDelete
  20. Deluded:

    I hate to generalise, but do all Bong girls sound so cute when they're angry? :D

    Express:

    "u r so stupid tht its not even funny!"

    Awww that was cute :) :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. @ alok

    no, only if theyre beautiful......otherwise theyre generally more annoying than cute

    Ah....stereotypes

    thats a whole new topic in itself...

    if anybody's interested...then i'll post on that too......

    anyone??

    ReplyDelete
  22. @ shania twain

    I like your blog too

    ReplyDelete
  23. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    This is SO funny!

    dude, you're funny

    ReplyDelete
  24. @ alok
    :-| :-| :-|

    @ deluded
    oh, BIG comment section. u really care?

    sad.

    and @ all the discussion on bong-gals-are-cute-when-angry

    can it get sicker?
    if yes, plz keep it to urself.

    ReplyDelete
  25. haha youre insane
    xD
    thanks though
    :D

    ReplyDelete
  26. okay. xD what do you prescribe?
    i'm so totally AGWA!!!!
    :|

    ReplyDelete
  27. oh and bytheway!!!!!! you've blogrolled me!!!!!!!
    I'll blogroll you as well.
    * chickendances *

    yes. AGWA.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Pretty girls dont count as AGWA!!!

    they have social lives......

    not only just cyber ones

    although, you CAN try donating Rs 1000 to the Dhongi baba trust fund
    ....
    that cures anyone of any disease

    you can give it to me.....Im the head of the organisation

    ReplyDelete
  29. Deluded:

    Awww Aww Aw

    Now look, she's completely pissed off now.

    What do you prescribe, then?

    ReplyDelete
  30. @ alok

    there's only one remedy now......

    my special currency- dher saara pyaar

    ReplyDelete
  31. Deluded:

    Awwww that's so nice :) :)

    So, here we go then

    *gives lotsa dher sara pyaar to Express*

    ReplyDelete
  32. @ alok
    rejected!

    I need the pizza. and yes, i have a real life, so gimme real stuff please me.

    :-P

    ReplyDelete
  33. @ deluded
    Yeah! I thought you had something to say about stereotypes....

    ReplyDelete
  34. @ diu

    nah......

    maybe sometime else

    ReplyDelete
  35. You've got one very cool head.
    And an even coolio-er perspective.
    Oh yeah, and, HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA.


    Peace.

    ReplyDelete
  36. whooops i seee.. u´ve added me in ur bloglist.. hey thanks :) :)
    creeeps.. the medicine case presentation gets on my nerves and with hardly FEW months left to finish the course, i feel no better than a first year.. lol
    so whos this AGWA in particular?? ahem ;)

    ReplyDelete
  37. @ xorkes

    how could I not?
    you write so much about so little(hair)

    about AGWA
    why? do you know someone who fits it?

    ReplyDelete
  38. lol.. thanks!! hair is not little alright.. hehehe!!
    ummm.. AGWA.. it reminds me of the hindi word meaning kidnapped.. lol ;)

    ReplyDelete
  39. @ xorkes

    hmmm....point

    I never saw it THAT way

    ReplyDelete
  40. Thanks for a marvelous posting! I seriously enjoyed reading it, you can be a great author

    ReplyDelete

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