why dont you go f*ck yourself !

no.

I dont mean you.

thats my message to 2008

this was almost the worst ending for the worst ever year Ive had.

that includes the mafioso being after me and my friend because we peed on their boss's favorite potted plant(couldnt help it! too much water in our system) and the aliens invading the earth and the indian politics.
they didnt?

whats ramadoss then??

yup. Im getting old.

oh, and Im getting you zero cakes, new year, the big 'o' treatment for you.

anyway,

I, at least, should try and confuse myself.

did that make sense? no? youre confused.

back to the post,

"he was really, just a normal guy. He hadnt ever done anything out of the ordinary. not yet. not ever, he thought. but then, that didnt matter. all he wanted was to get into college, and he had managed that, although barely. Now all he wanted was to get a low paying job, get a wife,kids and then perhaps when he would turn 45, middle-age crisis or some shit like that. because isnt that normal?

20 years he had spent. not doing what he wanted, but doing what was normal. fitting in, as his mother said. but then again, he argued with himself, all that he ever wanted was to be normal. and that much, he had achieved with a huge success.

but then, isnt it normal to have some aim in life? something to think about? something to live for? something to work your ass off? said an inner voice deep inside him. he had seen the kind. some were in love. some were into sports. some into studies. some were just passionate about anything really. passion. thats what youre missing. he thought. yet, he had never been fired up about anything. but he thought he WAS special. once, he had seen some object, something bright, which no one else could see.

then, one day. he saw that 'thing' again. he saw it on the roof of the library. but as soon as he ran up, there was nothing.2 days he spent, trying to search it out. you look strange, said his roommate. a week went by, and he was still searching. you seem engrossed in something else, said his best friend. 2 weeks. youre strangely happy, said the strange girl who sat with him in class.

but everything else, almost didnt even register in his mind. they didnt even matter. he was fascinated. by that brightness. nothing else was brighter. not even the sun. and only he could see it. somehow only he had seen it. nobody else would even understand, what he was going through. he was alone in this. but, he wasnt lonely. this feeling was different. from everything he had felt before.

one day, he finally spotted it. it glided along a deserted road. he had been here before, he realised. but everything seemed so different in that strange strange light. everything was no longer mediocre. each tree, each house, each bug, each spot on the road........they were all mysterious. and beautiful. his head was swarming with questions. things he had never thought before. which house was that? what shape was that flower? why do they call it end point? lots. lots. lots.

but the most fascinating thing, was floating away. he ran at top speed. but he could never really catch up. then suddenly, it stopped. he screamed, jumped up, lunged at it. he finally had it in his hands. this moment, is the most wonderful in my life. he thought. and then, as suddenly as it had appeared, it vanished. he felt wind on his face. realised he was falling. but it didnt really register. all he felt was sadness. for losing the thing. for losing that special part that he had discovered inside himself. it was great while it lasted. was his last thought.


they found him 3 days later. his glassy eyes were open. his lips curled in a half smile. he seemed sad. he seemed happy. he seemed amused. all at once.

even though he fell 20 feet. there were no external injuries, they reported. they couldnt figure out why he died. it was as if, he suddenly decided he had had enough, given up and died."







but then, isnt that how chasing a dream is like?

My mystery girl

mangalore to chennai......9 pm to 3 pm
it was going to be one HUGELY boring train journey, I thought. Lucky I brought insurance heh?
mobile-check
mobile with a kickass memory card-check
kickass songs in the memory card-check
laptop-check
laptop with kickass movies I havent seen-check
charge point for the low battery its showing -check

wait.
somethings wrong.......

its occupied by someone else's charger

some bloody-old-fart-who-doesnt-even-know-what-a..........wait.....NOT

hot girl-CHECK!!!!
hot girl sitting next to me-check!

woohooo!

she turned, looked up at me, said, 'oh, hi' and reached out.
we shook hands.
I took a good look at her as she sat on the brown seat
chocolate brown-she insisted
shitty brown,perhaps?-I ventured
how about shitty chocolate brown-she said

cheesy. I know*. but somehow I found it funny. laughed. hadnt laughed since god-knows-a-week. felt good. this is going to be sweeeeeeeet.thought I

we started talking.
9 pm, 10 pm, 11pm, 12.......3 am

suddenly realised I hadnt had dinner. neither did she.
6 packs of chips, 2 bottles of pepsi, 1 movie and 2 hours later, she suddenly

said - we're the same frequency, you know?' Agreed.

she sang, I air guitared....to......you know......my favourite song.....which

INCIDENTALLY turned out to be hers too. same frequency. def. def. def.

we even did whats customary......
sat at the footboard of the compartment, legs swinging
watching the sun rise from a moving train.
ever did that? its awesome.

yup.
we shared stuff. lots. lots lots.
dreams, hopes, futures, food, the same blanket, everything.

I even promised her I'll blog about her.

the frequency part? I think I understood now what she meant.

oh. damn.
chennai's already here.
DAMN YOU indian railways! cant you be late by a day or 2 when I need it?

i thought about saying PK's line- see you when I see you
it was apt

but then......nah........thatd be too cheesy. too not me.

we parted at the last possible moment.
I winked.
she winked back.
she blew a kiss.
I winked again.

and turned.
clenched my fist. I shouldnt shouldnt turn back. I must NOT turn back.

the most mysterious thing about it was....

we never shared any private info not even our names

she was probably like me, I think.
shed too many tears that shouldnt have been shed.
too hurt, maybe.

a black and white rainbow. thats how I describe our kind.

it was great. really.
but we both had meant it to be a one-time-only thing.
we both knew that from the start.
thats probably why she was the person I opened up to the most.
it was the same for her, I think.

whatever it was.
it was beautiful.

for a few hours of that fateful day.(guess! it was 15th. ha!)and on the next.

she colored up my rainbow again.

this is to you mystery girl.I hope you find some color again.

*Quote of the week: Mystery girl - its only cheesy if the person in front of you is not attractive.

the honest post

1. Im not a ladies man. specially on blogger (as proved by the AGWA fiasco on the previous post)

2. My life is going to change from 15th onwards. it SHOULD. i HAVE to do it.

3. life never turns out how it should have

4. NOTHING can beat a chocolate milkshake......unless its a frappe maybe. (OR if youre lactose intolerant! you old fart!)

5. must.get.out.of.suspended.animation.

6. screwingupthespacingsinsentencesisfun.

7. I hereby trademark 'feh'

8. Im thinking about changing the blog title. suggestions anyone?

9. you dont laugh at the zohan, and you dont mess with the deluded.

10. trying to gulp down salt....EVEN if its iodine fortified salt.....is never a good idea

11. I like girls. specially hot ones.

12. fresh and honest coffee and CCD have probably made a small fortune from me

14. 13 is an unlucky number.

13. but I try not to be superstitious.

15. I like girls. just wanted to assert on that.know any single hot girl by any chance?

16. Im hungry. and broke.

17. after all that ass-r*pe in 5th sem......am I eligible for compensation from the government?

18. anyone interested in writing me a guest post?

19. feh.

20. I like round figures(only in maths. not on girls)

my new discovery

ladies and gentlemen.

I have made the greatest discovery ever(repeat. EVER) in a student's life.

exams tomorrow?
cant study?

really need to study, but cant concentrate?

too much to study, too less time?


need to think?
think real hard? be really creative?

no problem.
its not a dream anymore.

I have discovered a new class of physiologically active biomolecules which have the greatest potential of mental stimulation.

it makes you upto 766.78% smarter as long as you are in influence of the substance.


ok. NOW youre curious, right?

fine.
I'll share my secret with you guys.

ever wonder why ALL the genius ideas anyone ever had was in the bathroom?

what?

newton discovered it under an apple tree you say?
think my friend. think.

what was he doing under there, when that apple fell on his head?

taking. a. poo.

open air, my dear. open air.
its a whole new experience.

anyways. back to the topic.

I have derived this new class of biomolecules from bathroom fart.

I call the class - farteins (patent pending)(kind of like proteins huh?)

the class contains different molecules like:
farton, fartose, fartoic acid, poopein, paadain, and so on.


one sniff.
and your IQ quintuples.
as long as you smell it.

yup.


I think this might just be nobel prize material








so next time that you have a mental block

just go to the bathroom.

it works wonders.

p.s. divz : your answer: no. mosquitoes have lower intelligence. so.......they cant fart.

Of flowers, chocolates and candlelight dinners.

yes.

no.


there is just NO probability that that shall ever be the topic of a post on this blog



feh.


oh.
wait.

it just did.


double feh.