New teachings of Calcism

brought to you by Deluded.....

directly from the mouth of the spiritual guru - dhongi baba



Fear to be gay,
for he who not fear to be gay, must be gay


Never say no to free food, because free food is................free food!


when fighting a guy bigger than you, fight to your advantage........hit him in the nuts
when fighting a guy smaller than you, fight fair and square.........hit him in the nuts
NEVER fight a girl............they dont have nuts


never trust british men.........they have a stiff upper lip(facial paralysis from neurosyphillis) (thats an STD, you morons)


when at a zoo, feed the monkeys some peanuts from your neighbour's bag.
also, feed the sri lankan tour guide some.



diamonds are a girl's best friends..............only if you have small apparatus

never drink coke after you've had some mentos.............your stomach will explode,
be safe.........drink beer instead


it is your basic right to hit up on a hot girl........its more important than the right to eat


monkey see, monkey do
monkey not eat cow dung off the street! bad monkey!


never try and drink a blend of coffee and leftover curry


its always fun to start a metal song in full sound and glory at 3 in the morning...........when your roommate has an exam the next day and is suffering from an acute shortage of sleep


to piss off a girl.............say PMS
to make her happy again...........say pink teddy






wow. this religion is truly awesome.

anyway

quote of the week: Dr. Coffee - married people do not feel the need for masturbation